Valentine’s
Day is not my favorite time of the year. Let’s face it, everyone at some time
or another has dreaded the arrival of February 14th. I used to think that
Valentine’s Day was made up by the big, consumerist, greeting card companies and
candy manufacturers who took it upon themselves to personally remind me that I
am single, that I have always been single, and I will always BE single. That was then, though. I do have friends who still find the day extremely difficult to
face if they don’t have someone to “boo love” with, who will get them waxy
candy and wilting flowers.
Me? I have a standing date with my Best Boy Buddy, Andrew. We get really good food and watch everyone else be in love for the night.
The
real history behind St. Valentine’s Day is slightly disturbing. The day has its
roots in a pagan holiday that took place in February called Lupercalia, which
was a purification festival in honor of Lupercus, the wolf-god that reared
Romulus and Remus. It also could quite possibly have been a fertility festival
in honor of the god Faunus (that half man half goat god that always wanted people to be horny). The festival would kick off with the sacrificing of
an animal, and the men would beat young women with bloody strips of the
animal’s skin to bestow fertility. No. Just...no.
The
most likely history of the day is that it is named for Valentine, a
Christian Martyr who was decapitated sometime around the 14th of February, back
when the centuries were in the single digits and Christianity was still kind of
new. The story goes that the Roman Emperor Claudius believed that if young
soldiers were married, they would not want to fight because they did not want
to leave their families. So, he banned marriages between young men and women.
However, Valentine, a priest, would marry young people in secret, against the
emperor’s wishes. Eventually, Claudius found out what he was doing, had him
arrested and sentenced to death.
During
Valentine’s time in prison, the story goes, the young couples he married would
pass notes of love and support to him through the barred windows. Another
legend is that Father Valentine fell in love with his jailer’s daughter and on
the day of his execution he passed her a
note that was signed “From Your Valentine” which is probably the spark that set
off the romantic notions that would follow centuries later.
When
the practice of pagan rituals was banned, Pope Gelasius I declared February 14
to be St. Valentine's Day, a day of love in all of its Christian morality and
chasteness. Centuries later, romantic authors such as Geoffrey Chaucer and
Shakespeare helped seal the deal with references to the day in their works.
Whatever
you believe of St. Valentine’s Day, the point is that most people do it because
they want the fairy tale. All you have to do is look around and see that the
bigger the gesture the greater the desperation.
Real couples do it for each other because they once felt that way and
now appreciate the special-ness, albeit rarely idyllic circumstance.
I don’t mind it because we
all know that the real holiday is February 15th when all the
Valentine’s Day candy goes on sale for 75% off!